Girls Und Panzer 04: This Show Deserves 5 As.

03 Dec

And so, it’s scientifically proven that the frequency of me watching Girls Und Panzer per month is nearly as equivalent as the number of times Oryou and Saemonza get to appear on screen and say something. Through clinical analysis, I even come up with a conclusion that I can type and post an entry on this blog as quick as Mako triumphantly marching her way to school. Oh by the way, Anzu is drop dead adorable in this episode.

“Hey, Darjeeling. Did you know that in a certain alternate universe you were once raped by 4 drunk soldiers? Oh, and I was also there being a nun who was also intoxicated for the whole night.”

Eventually, I’ve decided  that starting from now, I’m just going to type down my so-called analysis and personal point of view of this show instead of going all the way briefly narrating the whole episode. Plus it’s just plain pointless since readers who are already  familiar with this show especially those who are following it obviously already watched episode 6 or 7 by now. Plus it’s a really good show, reading amateur summaries here will be just a waste of time when you can actually use it to watch this awesome anime. Yes, it’s as awesome as Anzu munching on dried sweet potato strips.

Too easy to guess who’s going to win here if they’re playing Old Maid.

I am also now trying to adjust myself to think of the concept of Senshado here being equivalent to Pokemon; nobody’s going to die no matter how violent the match goes.. although Saori being concerned on Miho’s safety when she let her upper body out of the tank while the enemies are shooting barrages of shells on their tanks, which then replied with a dumb answer, “The bullets won’t really hit us on target.” Err, I don’t get it. I seriously don’t get it. Was she trying to say that she can quickly dodge the shells like a ninja or were those impacts caused by the shots are merely illusions? It’s like saying that Abe Lincoln’s death wasn’t caused by a bullet shot behind his head but was actually caused by a 3 inches elf drilling his skull behind.

Woah, finally a character who shows concern on the safety measure of this sport…

It is also revealed that the girls are actually allowed to destroy as much public  amenities and properties (that includes shops and houses) as possible  since all of the cost to repair them are probably funded by either the government or whatever managing the activity of Senshado from above.

And so, Oarai retained the strategy planned in the end of episode 3 except they’re now leaded by Miho (which from now on, I will start addressing by her nickname; Miporin). It’s true that although I still don’t like Miporin being all Mary Sue-ish even till now, I need to say that she’s slowly gaining my acknowledgement as the commander of the team.

“My fangs! They are too cute!!

Yes, for certain reason, I still want to see Momo-chan being the one leading them all regardless how she basically sucks so bad both in strategy planner and as a tank gunner… which is what she was actually doing through out half of this episode, most likely after getting pissed off that Anzu took her job away and gave it to Miporin. Somehow. I feel really bad for her being degraded from the strict vice student council president as well as the one leading Oarai’s Senshado club, to a total comic relief of the show. Then again, I can say that I’m fine with that as long as I get to continue her the melody of Ueda Kana screaming “Ute! Ute! Ute!”.

I swear it wasn’t me who left a vibrator on her seat!

Oh, to make the battle worse, the juniors from Oarai’s biggest tank ran away to save their loli ass. Can’t blame them since they’re the youngest among the bunch. Plus there’s this one inspirational quote from Sun Tzu that goes, “Better run away, survive and be a hero later than dying after achieving nothing in the battlefield.” Just kidding, I just made that up.

Run away~ Run away~ Run away~ Run away~ Run away~

And I hope it isn’t just me who realized that based on this cap, the animators themselves had trouble in distinguishing between the Team E’s driver and that clueless quiet girl in the same team, which somehow leaded them to miscoloured the two girls hair around.

And nope, this wasn’t even the first time.

Anyway, the best part came right when the only three heroine teams left went for their next plan where they “escaped” away from the mountains and drove into the town of Oarai. To be honest, I was strongly amused during this part mainly because I didn’t expect the match has almost no limitation in picking their own battlefield.

“That’s okay, I once rode a chariot that shoots giant macaroons, got my head chopped off and somehow I still manage to live in the end.”

Oh God, Team C (the history buffs cosplayers) and Team D (the volleychicks) were so freaking badass when they launched their own sneak attacks . I’d be lying if I didn’t loudly scream “You’re f#cked, b#tches! You’re f#cked!!” on a couple of St. Gloria’s tanks during these scenes……… in my head.

Sad thing both of their victories were shortlived. I had a good laugh on Team C being all overconfident only to have their tank decorations back(literally)firing them but somehow felt really bad on Team D, most likely because the tank they epically shot from behind wasn’t even eliminated but also managed to emerge from the flames (seriously, aren’t the girls inside supposed to be toasted already?) and simply counter-defeated them, all thanks to a flawed hideout. It’s still not as sad as seeing my Oryou getting less and lesser screentime though.

Miporin’s tank was the only one left to survive. While the voice of a cheesy 60’s superhero series narrator rang in my head, asking how they are going win this match, the golden tank of the Student Council jumped in to save the day!!

Don’t get me wrong, Momo-chan. I like your monocle but based on how you suck in shooting, I think it’s about time you switch to a pair of proper glasses..

Of course, the epic moment died a premature death thanks to Momo-chan’s awesome ability in shooting shells through absolutely nothing, while being right in front of the faces of four enemy tanks.

“ fact you can’t even kill us. I even made my Churchill immortal by cladding him with the Ginstrnag’s Love.”

Back to square on, Miporin and friends had to gamble on any strategy they left which included faking a straight ambush on their opponents. After successfully taking down two enemy tanks in a row, they drove towards the enemy’s main tank driven by Darjeeling and her two servants (?). You seriously need to adore the dramatic face-off and simultaneous blasts by both the commanders of Oarai and St. Gloria before the match officially ended with Oarai’s (second) last white flag popping out.

Enjoy some first year loli ass. We’ll be right back after these messages.

As promised, the whole members of Team A had to face the penalty of doing the Ankou Dance. My love on Anzu deepens as she stated out that she’d be joining along with Momo-chan and Yuzuko with a reasonable excuse that the trio were the ones to be blamed for their school’s loss. I found this absolutely and obviously right mainly because Momo-chan’s craziness and sloppiness while working as the self-proclaimed captain and controlling the turret contributed at least 75% of their downfall.

I still rather do watch this performance over a mob doing PSY’s retarded horse dance. Oh, nice legs you girls have there, Oryoumonza.

Turns out, Anzu was the only one who enjoyed doing the dance : 3 (Well, Yuzuko too..) Big credits to Hiryuu subs for this gif.

About most of the second half of the episode centered around Hana revisiting her family and for the sake of Lord, her mom is a total bitch you usually find in a cliche family soap opera! I have to say I really had mixed reactions on this part. I’m fairly glad to see Hana finally getting some focus and background establishment on how serious her family takes on the art of flower arrangement instead of just being stuck as the nice girl of the group. Oh, and right here we also get to witness the very first talking male in their world.. Well, there were already a couple of old geezers shown during the match actually.

How Adam and Eve met, in a parallel universe…

On the negative side, I can’t help but find this dilemma being kinda cliche when it comes to family drama. I know I don’t watch that much family soap operas but having a mother who always tune in Korean dramas on the TV in the living room is enough to let you know how overused this dilemma is.

Oh crap, she’s going to morph into a typical asshole mother.. Run before she blows!

And then there’s that uneasiness I felt about how people in the universe of this show accept Senshado. After adjusting myself to think that Senshado won’t spill the blood of young girls, this one bitch of the  Isuzu house started to go nuts and ranted about the evilness of tanks. I don’t know but it felt as confusing as listening to a priest during a church mass preaching about Jesus bringing everyone, including sinners, to Heaven but later then your religious roommate told you that you’re going straight to hell and get burnt as he sees your Super Sonico wallpaper.

Oh, screw you F#ckermother! I just survived from a brain damage caused by those over the top Korean drama played on TV, I don’t need to see more douchebag moms in my anime!

Anyway, I like the character development implemented on Hana when she stood for her own decision to not leave Senshado and risked herself from getting ditched from the family. Not just Hana, the rest junior members of Team E even confronted the heroines to ask for a deep apology for running away during their previous match. Had I not watch episode 5 at the time of writing this entry, I would already start worrying about them leaving the club and never reappear again in later episodes.

Sorry is not good enough. You girls have to perform the Ankou dance without the pink suit and nothing else!

As the heroines climbed back to their ship to leave the land, the Student Council trio appeared, ready to hand a box to Miporin which was a present from Darjeeling who has now acknowledging her (or them) both as a new friend and worthy rival. The episode ended with them registering in an official Senshado tournament.

Coolness. I has it.

Overall, this episode turned better than I expected. The action and comedy during the tank battle were mixed well together and I really like how they manage to make the girls of Oarai (at least for Team C, and D) showing off their badass side and how powerful they can be at the same time did not scrap away the idea that they were still underdogs and newbies.The slight development on the other girls from other teams imho were pretty well done too. While I’m still yet to stop disliking Miporin’s character, her role as the commander of the whole troops of Oarai didn’t seem to be absurdly overpowered as how she was depicted in episode 3 where the shells fired from her team’s tanks worked as magically effective and accurate as Arnold’s bullets in Commando.

“These are urns storing the ashes of my five comrades who tragically perished in this battle.. JK, they’re just tea. Expensive high quality British tea, I mean.

-Your super sexy rival commander


With all the upcoming new casts of girls (who I’m sure going to turn out to be interesting characters like Darjeeling) from other school for them to compete with, this show really starts to feel like Saki, with the exception that Ueda Kana is no longer the genius player here…

Quote of The Day:
Darjeeling and her Brit-tea-ish pride.

Oh, in case people may think the “5 As” is a form of grade, it’s actually an acronym of “Amusingly Awesome And Adorable Anzu.”

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Posted by on December 3, 2012 in Anime



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